Welcome back to your favorite podcast about the Performing Arts. Theater, opera, musical, we got it all covered! This week we brush up on some of the important theater terms, and then we meet a whole lot of guys. Who did JonCon fuck in the Golden Company? And what are all the sellsword companies like? Are they normal? The answers may surprise you!
I swear there was at least 10 additional minutes of Forrest Gump talk that I cut out. Somebody get us theatre tickets we're getting desperate.
Chapters: ADWD The Wayward Bride, Tyrion VII
Outro music: Gump by Weird Al Yankovic
a new episode!!! this one is called "Pussy Fetus Magic". it's the jon chapter where melisandre touches his "wolf" and davos turns out to be alive and gets his boyfinding mission. the song is char ga kuru by koichiro hori
We're back once again talking about the greatest literary character of all time. That's right, it's a Melisandre chapter! Dany is also here and I'm gonna be honest I already forgot what happened in her chapter. Let's say she had a talk with Skahaz and Mo Reznak and cried about Missandei's dead brother.
Kay edited this one so I have no idea what the title means nor do I have any memory recording it. Here's what Kay says about it:
"the episode is called ASOBAPBBQ. it's about theon hears some very cool stories from roose and tyrion hangs out on a boat. the song is will anybody ever love me"
Just like Bran in this chapter, we take a glimpse into the past... into the distant year of 2024, when "Hawk Tuah" was all the rage. Jon is also here and uhhh, well let's just say, he really fucked up this time. That's right, he introduced heterosexuality to the Night's Watch boys. If you ask me, he really deserves to die for this.
How many women does the Feminist fuck? A thousand women, and one. (somberly) the one women is Roose Bolton's wife
Chapters: ADWD Daenerys VI, The Prince of Winterfell
Outro music: Sober to Death by Car Seat Headrest
Cersei is plotting, Doran is plotting, the Sand Snakes are hissing and the Watcher is watching. Meanwhile, back at the Wall Jon is doing everything he can to make as many enemies as possible while alienating his remaining friends. This can only go well! I say "Oberon" instead of "Oberyn" a million times in this episode for some reason. So close!
We check in on Theon's number of balls (unchanged) and discuss whether Barbrey should fuck him or someone else (yes).
Chapters: ADWD Tyrion IX, The Turncloak
Outro music: No Joy by The Beths. because it was a tyrion and theon episode
Honestly, George fell off. TWOW might not even be good. It might be bad, if these two chapters are any indication! We'll still keep reading that garbage.
Chapters: ADWD The King's Prize, Daenerys VII
Outro music: Linda Ronstadt - Poor, Poor Pitiful Me